Monday, February 22, 2010

If my man wants a sausage party, by golly I give it to him!

This week C celebrates his 33rd birthday (yeah, that's right. I'm 2 years older than him. I'm one of them cougars. Meow! Okay, so I'm not a cougar, but C assures me that I am a MILF - to which I say, aww thanks, babe! Now why ya be goin' and gettin' all romantic-like?)

Anyway, C has to work all week, so the kids and I threw him a little pre-birthday soiree here at home. Bear and Maggs gave him some clothes (okay, really it was I who gave him the clothes because the children don't have any money and can't drive or anything - they're kinda lazy like that) - you know his usual "Cholo on Easter" attire (I totally stole that from Knocked Up, but this description just suits the hubs and his "look" ever so well). I also made him two of my famous "mixed tapes." I put a lot of effort into these musical endeavours because, while I like to think that my knowledge of most genres of music is above average, my familiarity with rap and country is admittedly fairly limited, and rap is C's music of choice. It's actually pretty funny to be trying to select the best songs for these compilations and to hit the thirty second "preview" on itunes, only to hear "Move bitch!/ Get out the way!" or "You's a fine mother fucker/ won't you back that ass up?" - at which point the kids come running from the next room to inquire if I'm listening to "Daddy's music." You know what they say - it's all fun and games until someone calls social services...

Nevertheless, my CD's are usually a big hit with the hubs because, as my son is fond of saying, "I'm too good." In order to add flavor to the festivities C style, I suggested that we grill some sausages to go along with dinner, as this is one of the hubs' personal favorites. I myself opted for a few pomegranate martinis (damn, I'm hooked on those suckers!).

When it's all said and done, I think that the hubs' birthday party was a success. Just before bed, I paused to give C a tender peck on the cheek and to whisper ever so lovingly, "Happy Birthday, Honey. I really hope that you enjoyed your sausage party." Because I'm considerate like that. If my husband wants a sausage party for his birthday, by golly I let my man have a sausage party! I am such an awesome wife like that.

I hope everyone is getting into the swing of things on this fine Monday morning. If I can ever figure out a way to balance housework and mom duties with my blog addiction, maybe I'll get around to finishing one of the 50 unfinished drafts I have going right now (keeping my fingers crossed). But for now, I'm going to go fold laundry and scrub some toilets. Jealous much?

32 comments:

The Mommyologist said...

I'm sure my hubs would love a sausage party too. LOL!

I can't seem to figure out how to manage my blog addiction with everything else either. Being on vacation this week has been like torture because I've neglected the blog world so much. It's like crack.

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

He really is the luckiest husband ever. Not many wives are willing to throw sausage parties, you know?

And you make him mix tapes? You are fantastic!

Andrea (ace1028) said...

Hilarious. My hubby would love a party like that, too. ;) I really need to get into a martini stage. It might be fun!

Wym said...

Arg, now we have to have a sausage party for my man's day. I told him about your post and he loved the idea of mixed tapes and sausage.

MiMi said...

My hubs would love a sausage party! Man, I'm gonna have to save this in my "weirdness for hubs" file.
Also, I'm a cougar too. Meow. Okay, only 6 months, but still. Enough that he graduated a year behind me. Which is weird since I had a strict rule in h/s...NEVER date somebody younger. Ew.

Erin said...

I am jealous that you have 50 drafts. I tend to only have one or two at a time, if that. I usually write spur-of-the-moment or when something comes to me....

And I keep saying "sausage" in my head and then crack up laughing. Because I'm naughty like that.

Aunt Becky said...

I live in a sausage factory. Does that count?

Grateful Twin Mom said...

50 drafts and a mixed tape? You are so together!!! Love the mixed tape. Makes me want to watch John Cusack's High Fidelity.

Amie said...

Your like totally Demi with your cougar self! MEEEOOWWW. You are the queen of mix tapes.

leigh said...

I love you.

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

That cholo on Easter line is classic.

Any gal who gives her hubs a sausage party for is birthday is a good woman. I hope he appreciated it.

Maven said...

I am jealous. I need to get my house cleaned and have no time!

Meanwhile, the sausage party! You really are that. Fabulous.

*grin*

Bathwater said...

While I am not jealous of what is keeping you from posting, I feel the pain of the draft button.

I am glad that was the type of sausage party he wanted the other type is NOT any fun.

Aidan Donnelley Rowley @ Ivy League Insecurities said...

Balance is bologna. Thrilled to have found your blog via Theta Mom. Absolutely dig the name of this place. 'Existential' is probably my favorite word of all time.

I will be back!

Candice said...

Did you make up cool games like "hide the sausage" at this party?

Or "pin the tail on the sausage"? That one could have been fun.

Susan Erickson said...

Hubs is definately a lucky man...bangers and booze are the right ingredients...add a little meow mix and ...."wasn't it a party!" love your writing...still laughing over the cheese product blog!

Amy said...

The mix tape cracks me up! Very thoughtful, love! Hope your hubby liked his party:)

Kristin said...

Nothing like a goooooood sausage parTAY! The addition of mixed tapes takes it to a whole other level!

Organic Motherhood with Cool Whip said...

Sausage Party? You ARE a good wife. Bwahahahaahaha. And BTW, "You know what they say - it's all fun and games until someone calls social services..." has still got me rolling. That sounds like every day at my house...

Alyssa said...

My daughter refers to daddy's music, too, so that made me laugh...as did so much more. I'm saving the cheetah thing for later years and another husband/life.

At my house, laundry gets done, but cleaning? toilets? I'm ecologically economical in my decreased use of household products.

ModernMom said...

SOunds like a perfect man party! You go girl:)

Sarah said...

My little one is super lazy, too. When you figure out a way to balance motherhood and blogging, please let me know!

JennyMac said...

Happy Bday week to C! :)

And the title of this post made me laugh. Love it.

jules said...

that's awesome. my hubs loves sausage too. i may just have to steal this idea come september 19th!

The Wifey said...

Haha. All we ever have around here are sausage parties. The only females who come over are married. :)

And I can't stand the taste of pomegranate martinis. Wow! I don't know how you do it.

Southern Sage said...

Sausage parties always rock!

Tracie said...

I'm trying to get some balance in my life too. Trying and failing. I've been tempted to drop the blog to take care of real life. (The Horror!)

PS I'm 2 years older than my husband too.

Wym said...

I gave you an award!

Katherine said...

I'm sorry, this blog post had me wanting to say, "that's what SHE said" so many times - it's a curse - living with two teenage boys. ha ha

Sounds like a fun time, sausage and all. Loved "are you listening to Daddy's music?"

Brittany at Mommy Words said...

My hubby would love that! You are a good woman! My hubbies mix tapes have the nasty words in them too - not from rap from rock but still - so not kid appropriate!

Happy Birthday to your hubby!

Sorry I have sucked at being bloggy since the baby. I am back! I think!

MOMSICLE VIBE said...

Mix tapes are the BESSSSSSSSSSST!!! We have a FIVE TAPE CAROUSEL (no lie) and it is just so romantic to sit and listen to the relic whizz and click and clack while enjoying some tunes. Thanks for the idea of adding sausage to the mix. You sound like a great wife!! I on the other hand...

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

you are SUCH an awesome wife. i forgot my husband's bday until my son reminded me and then i was all swift and went out and bought a cake at the store on the DL. his bday IS december 29. WORST THING EVER